• Teresa Bulford-Cooper

What is Happiness and how do I find it?

Updated: May 6

What is happiness to you?” What exactly does happiness mean? Studies say that examples of happiness or the emotion of being happy are just - well feeling happy!

As a Life Coach to Women over 50 I can tell you that to find real happiness you have to have confidence and be at one in your own skin, accept you for who you are - which means that you are in a place of contentment and at peace within your self. You would have set goals and know exactly (well more or less) what you want from life and have the knowledge that allows you to get it.

In other words you have managed to reach a place of inner peace, tranquility and self love, having made decisions about and know what it is that brings you joy and deep down contentment by setting your future goals - which is an amazing feat in its self.

What with the world in constant turmoil, family and friends with problems there are many distractions that take you off course and interfere with your happiness - throwing curve balls at you left right and centre. It’s almost like the universe is testing us constantly to see if we have the ability to solve all the problems it throws at us, we are in a constant state of updating our very existence.

Having the tools and ability to deal with problems as they arise is part and parcel of being able to stay on an even keel of happiness. I can hear my Dad saying to me,“don’t letter the buggers wear you down.”

Being resilient is an essential tool to have under your belt, not letting anything knock your confidence and push you off your happy pedestal.

So how do you create your tools and armour to enable you to be and stay happy?

Here are 7 things for you to take into consideration which I address with clients in my 7 step coaching program.

1.The key factor to happiness is self confidence. Build your confidence and you will be able to reach out and take what you want without feeling guilty and selfish.

2.Come to terms with what you can and cannot change. Find ways around what you can’t change to bring happiness instead of trying to change it and becoming resentful. Accept that we all have bad days and it will pass.

3.Explore the triggers that rob you of your happiness and deal with them one at a time.

4. Think about what you truly desire in your life and what do you want to be doing in a few years time and with whom? Set yourself some goals.

5. What is it that you need to be doing to make your life happier? Do you need companionship, a new hobby, move house, be closer to family?

6. Make a list of what you dream about doing and having in your life. This does not have to be big things - little tweaks can make a big difference to your happiness.

7.Try not to become overwhelmed in other peoples problems - you can’t help everyone. I learnt long ago that as much as I wanted to that I could not help everyone in life.

Being happy should not be looked at as a luxury thing, it is essential for your wellbeing and mental health. Knowing how to reach it is not always clear cut and sometimes people go around in circles looking for ways to be happy, never feeling content with life.

Having happiness for a short while is a quick fix but to have that deep down contented inner happiness is something that needs to be worked on and nurtured. Once you have it, it needs maintaining and cosseting.

If you find happiness is eluding you then reach out and let me help you. You deserve that inner happiness. Give me a call and let’s discuss way for you to find and keep it.

With love

Teresa. x

P.S. Check out my bite sized courses on confidence building and coping with stress & anxiety here.

Download my free e books:

15 Ways To Build Your Confidence

13 Ways your daughter can Grow her Confidence

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